Jim Perrin — a cuckoo in the nest?

In another letter to our sister, Jim Perrin — ruthlessly and without any shame — applied the greatest pressure in order to persuade her that she should ‘get rid’ of her current partner: he who was still living in their home and funding the household; still sharing their bedroom; and who had his long-established business and workshop in one of their barns. Ref. our post Jac’s Last Long Relationship.

In her own way, which was never confrontational, and in her own time, not wishing to cause her partner greater hurt, by now Jac felt she wished for a separation, albeit she was certainly having second thoughts. He had his life there too, and his workshop-studio, and she hated to cause him unnecessary extra pain; and then of course there would be the enormous upheaval of moving the contents of his work-shop; all the wood, tools and machinery which he had accumulated over the years. So, as we said, in her own time and in her own way Jac was trying to find a civilized solution.

*    *    *    *    *

But Jim Perrin would brook no obstacle to his plan to move into our sister’s house, and away from his own which by now he knew the CSA was targeting, and was not to be thwarted. He, always a domineering and controlling man (it is evident), decided to take steps to orchestrate the situation for his personal advantage.

This is what he wrote to Jac, at her own address, from his house in Llanrhaeadr ym Mochnant on August 18th 2003:

‘I woke this morning in a state of great clarity and purpose — so I went and consulted the I Ching  [there surely is some contradiction in thought here?] and got some clear and positive guidance and now have a plan to act upon.’ Jim Perrin, it would seem, has much recourse to the I Ching. It always tells him what he wishes to know and what he has already done or intends to do…

We have quoted in previous posts, ref. ‘Jim Perrin Consults the I Ching’, his fortuitous (if not fatuous) interpretations when using this ancient Chinese system of divination; one which some may think no more reliable than reading tea-leaves or casting the entrails of sacrificial animals, and ‘some may think’ any good fairground fortune-teller might do as well — possibly long-skilled in their knowledge of human frailties — for those who seek their aid. We believe that Jim Perrin’s use of the I Ching is a pretension and that it is one of his methods of subtle domination — invariably it is his ally.

*    *    *    *    *

His next paragraph (throughout his letter carefully alternating stick and carrot… ) is full of ‘loving’ flattery to our sister, and cajolery, and of his feelings for her and of his plan for them to live together — note there is no further talk of renting a place nearby, as he had disingenuously suggested, ‘testing the water’, in a previous letter? — ‘a safe and welcoming haven for ourselves AND THOSE WE LOVE’  (our capitals). He is talking about Jac’s house, her home, which was just as he described and had been ever since she, her children and her partner had lived there.

Yet when, Mission Accomplished, he moved in, it quickly became apparent that Jim Perrin was indeed only ‘a cuckoo in the nest’. Wanting everything his own way he warded off all friends, family and even her children if and when he could — ref. our previous posts — and this controlling behaviour — his modus operandi, was in evidence months before she was even ill and was herself, because of that illness, less ‘in control’. This was observed and discussed at length by Jac, her sisters and her friends.

Then, after more flowery and ‘intimate’ passages, to continue quoting from this letter, he finally reveals his main purpose; the preamble to which is: ‘I want to be very frank and straightforward in what I say here — don’t take offense — you have this man  [‘this man’!]  in your home… ‘ He proceeded by insulting him gratuitously and used as well, for good measure, much of his favoured pseudo-psychology, then, the ground prepared, he reached the high point of malevolence.

The truly wicked passage reads:

‘Get his stuff into bin-bags.  Let him camp out in the barn for as long as he properly [a well-used Perrin word] needs to finish his commissioned work, and give written notice to get everything out from your property by a given date [they having lived there together for nearly sixteen years] — I’d have thought end of August would have been more than generous. He clearly won’t go unless you are firm, explicit and final around it. Be clear and firm with him — tell him where to go; to find rental property, and be unrelenting in keeping the pressure on — make with the bin-bags and write the note.’

*     *     *     *     *

There is something of a stoat mesmerising a rabbit about all this…  and in several letters to our sister, from which we have quoted in earlier posts, he not only applied coercion and psychological pressure but other control mechanisms worthy, we feel, of a would-be sect leader.

As he wrote to Jac once, using the classic line of an abuser: ‘If you love me you will do this.’  Ref. our post Jim Perrin applies more pressure.

However, his suggested ‘notice to quit’ falling on deaf ears and the wished for ‘eviction’ failing to materialise, Jim Perrin took it upon himself to go uninvited to Jac’s house, to confront her partner, to threaten him with police involvement — court orders, injunctions and the like — if he did not leave, as well as other similar ‘blandishments’ such as what he would do to him if he ever returned…

Jac’s sisters.

N.B.  Whenever we have quoted from Jim Perrin’s letters to our sister we have been scrupulous in quoting accurately what he wrote, including his punctuation.